Managing Chronic Illness While Working Full-Time as a Single Mom
This September has felt like a whole new season of life. Emma started grade 3, and I stepped into a brand-new full-time role as an Educational Assistant. Up until now, I was supplying, which meant my schedule had more breathing room. Now, I’m learning the rhythm of being in the classroom every day, while still holding space for my nutrition clients in the evenings and weekends.
The mornings are a blur of backpacks, lunch boxes, and making sure I don’t forget my own coffee in the rush. And underneath it all, there’s the quiet hum of my body reminding me: you live with a chronic illness.
It’s a strange dance, really. I want to show up fully at work, I want to be present for Emma, I want to keep the house somewhat together, and somewhere in there I also want a sliver of space to breathe. To rest. To feel like myself beyond the roles of mother, worker, homemaker. If you’ve ever felt like you’re expected to “do it all” while carrying pain, fatigue, or any invisible struggle - you know how heavy that load can be.
Here’s what I’ve learned (and what I’m still practicing) about navigating full-time work, motherhood, chronic illness, and business ownership without completely losing myself in the process.
1. Energy Is Currency - Spend It Wisely
Living with chronic illness has taught me to treat energy like money. Some days I wake up with a full bank account, other days I’m already in overdraft before the alarm goes off. Instead of pushing through (which always backfires), I try to budget.
That might mean saying no to an extra commitment, taking shortcuts with dinner, or leaving the laundry folded but not put away. When I spend energy only where it truly matters - Emma, my health, my lover, my family, my friends, my work, my clients, I’m less likely to spiral into a flare.
2. Build Micro-Moments of Rest
I used to think rest had to mean an entire afternoon in bed or a weekend of quiet. But life as a single mom doesn’t allow for that kind of luxury. Now, I take rest in micro-doses.
Five minutes of deep breathing before work. Lying flat on the floor for a few minutes after work. Closing my eyes at lunch and feeling my body settle, even for 60 seconds. These pauses may not look like much, but they add up. They remind my nervous system that I’m safe, that it doesn’t have to run on high alert all the time.
3. Anchor Your Day with One Non-Negotiable
With so many moving parts, self-care can easily slide to the bottom of the list. I’ve found it helps to choose one non-negotiable - the thing that keeps me tethered no matter how chaotic the day gets.
Some days that’s putting collagen in my morning coffee, other days it’s a 10-minute walk outside, or making sure I’m in bed before 10pm. It doesn’t have to be grand or Instagram-worthy. It just has to be consistent enough that your body and mind trust you to show up for yourself.
4. Ask for (and Accept) Support
This one is hard for me. As a single mom, I’ve learned to be fiercely independent - but independence can quickly morph into isolation. The truth is, we’re not meant to do life alone.
Support doesn’t always look like someone swooping in to save the day. Sometimes it’s Emma helping with small tasks, a friend checking in, or giving myself permission to order takeout instead of cooking. Support can also mean leaning on systems - like before/after-school programs, meal prep hacks, or simply letting people know when I’m not okay instead of pretending I’ve got it all together.
5. Release the Myth of “Doing It All”
Here’s what I keep circling back to: “doing it all” is a lie. Behind every woman who looks like she’s managing perfectly is a hidden sacrifice - sleep, health, joy, presence. I don’t want to sacrifice my healing or my connection with Emma just to keep up appearances.
So I let things slide. Sometimes the dishes stay in the sink. Sometimes I cancel plans. Sometimes Emma eats takeout for dinner. That doesn’t make me less of a mother, or less of a professional, or less of a woman. It makes me human.
Grace Over Perfection
Right now, my life looks like school hallways and classroom routines by day, and client sessions and meal plans by night. It’s a lot—and my body reminds me often of its limits - but it’s also deeply meaningful. I get to help children thrive in school and help women find their way back to their health. Both roles light me up in different ways, even if they also stretch me.
Managing a chronic illness while working full-time and raising a child is not about becoming superhuman. It’s about grace. It’s about honesty - with yourself, your body, and the people around you. It’s about lowering the bar where you can, and fiercely protecting the things that actually matter.
So if you’re reading this and you’re in the same season - running on empty, trying to hold all the pieces, wondering if you’re doing enough - I hope this gives you permission to exhale. You are not behind. You are not failing. You are navigating a harder path with courage that doesn’t always get seen.
And maybe, just maybe, the point isn’t to do it all. Maybe the point is to do what matters, in the most loving way you can.
P.S. If you’re walking through work, motherhood, and chronic illness too - and you feel like your body is begging for support - I’d love to help you find more energy, ease, and nourishment. You can learn more about my nutrition practice and book a free consult.
With heart,
Alexis Tanner | The Nutritionist Mama
Holistic Nutritionist
Guiding women to heal chronic illness through nutrition, lifestyle & nervous system support.