The Person Behind My Healing (Part 1)
I talk a lot about what healed me. The food. The supplements. The gut work. The nervous system healing. The sleep. The hormones. The testing. The deep emotional work. And all of that is true. All of it matters!
But there's one thing I don't talk about enough. And she deserves an entire blog post dedicated to her (and more).
My mom.
She was there before anyone else
My symptoms started somewhere between age 8 and 10. Back pain that nobody could explain. By 12, scoliosis. By 13, fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome. And from the very first appointment to the very last, my mom was there.
Every single doctor's appointment. Every medical test. Every specialist referral. Every treatment. She drove me. She sat with me. She advocated for me when I was too young or too exhausted to advocate for myself. She did the research WITH me, back when there was barely any internet and nobody had heard of fibromyalgia. She sat with me while I grieved the life I thought I was supposed to have. She listened, for HOURS, while I talked about my pain, my fatigue, my stiffness, my insomnia. Over and over and over again. She never once told me to stop talking about it. She never once made me feel like a burden!
She watched me push through things no kid should have to push through
Playing competitive soccer with a body that was screaming at me to stop. Flaring after every single game and practice. Taking medications that left me comatose, trying to stay awake in class, trying to keep my grades up. Dealing with side effects that nobody warned us about. People not believing me. People not understanding. Trying to be social while living with chronic pain and fatigue that nobody could see. Trying to work part-time and go to school. Trying to get through university AND play varsity soccer. Trying to act normal when nothing about my body felt normal!
And through all of it, she was there. Brainstorming with me. Problem-solving. Sitting in waiting rooms. Never giving up on finding answers even when the system gave us none. She watched me build a career and then watched my body say ENOUGH. Trying to work full-time after university with a chronic illness that nobody at work knew about. Trying to date. Trying to earn enough money for all the trial and error treatments that weren't covered by insurance. Living with the quiet fear that one day I might end up on disability despite the fact that I'm bright and Type A and have big dreams for myself.
She saw all of it. The pushing. The crashing. The pushing again. She never told me to slow down (she knew I wouldn't listen lol). But she was always there to catch me when I fell.
She was there for the hardest season of my life
When Emma was a baby, everything changed. I became a single mom and needed somewhere safe to go. My mom opened her door without hesitation. That same week, we lost my dad suddenly. The same WEEK.
I don't share the details of what came after that publicly. But what I will tell you is that the years that followed were the most stressful, the most painful, and the most financially devastating period of my entire life. And my mom stood behind me through every single second of it. Emotionally. Financially. Practically.
She takes Emma to school so I can get to work on time. She's there for Emma when I can't be. She has given more of herself to us than I could ever put into words. I never truly understood what it meant to be a selfless mother until I became one myself. And now I look at her and think, how did you do all of this? HOW?
She's stronger than she knows
My mom grew up losing her father and brother within two years of each other. Her mother became a single parent. My mom helped raise her younger sister. She knows what hard looks like. She was BUILT for hard.
She married my dad and raised three children with incredible strength. She became a widow at 65 when my dad died. Too young. Way too young.
She was diagnosed with Graves' disease in her 40s, likely brought on by the stress she was under. Had part of her thyroid radiated. And you know what? She managed her illness naturally. Without medication. Sound familiar? (lol) I wonder where I get it from!
At her age, this woman is still downhill skiing, playing pickleball, hiking, swimming and travelling with her grandchildren. She is more active than most people half her age. She's had multiple knee surgeries and a broken wrist and bounced back from every single one faster than anyone expected. Her body heals FAST because her body is healthy. And here's something that blows my mind every time I think about it. She is the only person her age that I know who is not on a single medication. NOT ONE. In a world where most people her age have a medicine cabinet full of prescriptions, she has NONE. If that doesn't tell you everything about the power of living naturally, I don't know what does! She is PROOF that you can live fully with a chronic condition. I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree!
Why I'm telling you this
Because when you live with a chronic illness, or when you're going through something traumatic or stressful, you NEED the right support. You cannot do this alone. I truly believe that.
For me, that person was my mom. For you, it might be a parent, a friend, a partner, a sister, a practitioner, or a community of women who understand what you're going through.
If you don't have that person yet, I want you to know that I see you. And I want to BE that person for you. That's why I built my course. Not just to teach you about food and supplements and gut health and hormones. But to walk BESIDE you through this. Because nobody should have to figure this out alone!
Mom, if you're reading this (and I know you are lol), thank you. For everything. For every appointment, every late night, every tear you wiped, every dollar you spent, every time you showed up when I couldn't show up for myself. I love you so much, even when I don't show it enough. You are the reason I'm still standing. You are the reason I can now help other women stand too.
I love you.
You don't have to do this alone
If you're living with a chronic illness and you feel like nobody understands, start with my free guide. It covers the 5 things nobody has told you about your chronic illness, and one actionable step for each.
Download the free guide: What Nobody Has Told You About Your Chronic Illness
And if you're ready to go deeper, join the waitlist for my 12-module course Becoming Yourself Again, launching July 24! It's everything I spent 30+ years figuring out, in one place. So you don't have to do it alone!
Cheers to the mamas who never gave up on us.
xo, Alexis
Registered Holistic Nutritionist | The Nutritionist Mama | thenutritionistmama.com